“Mom, are you OK?” Bubbers stopped what he was doing when he saw me crying and hugging his dad today.
I swallowed and tried to smile. “Yeah. I’m sad you’re starting high school.”
Sympathy filled his eyes. I’ve been his teacher for his entire life. That’s all we’ve known and now we’re stepping into the unknown. We knew someday he’d graduate from our homeschool program and we’d have to pick the next step. But the depth of my sadness still caught me by surprise. And I can’t run from it anymore because it’s here.
My little boy starts BYU Online High School in three days.
“I’m sorry,” Bubbers said and I knew he meant it.
“It’s OK.” I pushed the words out of my breaking heart. “It’s good. You’re going to do a wonderful job.”
We both needed to hear those words and he smiled. “Thanks.”
And it’s true. He *is* going to be amazing. And this *is* a good thing for him.
I carefully wrap those truths as tender bandages around my heart to hold it together as it grieves. Because it still hurts. And it still makes me so sad.
I love you, my dear son! Here we go. :)