It’s been one week since I started bleeding and knew I was going to lose my baby.
One week since people started telling me, “Heidi, I’m so sorry.”
One week since I didn’t know what else to reply but, “Thanks,” (???) because I didn’t want to say, “It’s okay.”
One week since I began avoiding my feelings without realizing it until Charming sat me down last night and made me let it all out.
One week since I wanted everyone to know and nobody to know all at the same time.
One week since I tried to write more about it but couldn’t.
One week since a friend emailed me a stranger’s blog where I have found inexplicable comfort by grieving for her loss along with my own.
One week since I can finally let myself pray about it.
One week since Bubbers became my absolute comfort and joy such that I realized I couldn’t leave him at a friend’s house just long enough to go to the doctor, because I couldn’t bear the thought of being away from him for even a second.