Every time we have someone over for dinner, my husband inevitably turns to me with a devilish grin and knowing look in his eyes.
Oh, no, here it comes…
“Hey, Heidi,” he’ll say, “Why don’t you tell them The Chicken Story?”
“The Chicken Story?” our guests repeat in bewilderment.
Then Charming laughs, folds his arms and settles back in his chair, waiting for the show to begin.
“You won’t believe this,” he always says, “It’s hilarious.”
Then I shake my head, take a deep breath and begin.
“Well, I grew up on a farm of sorts, and when I was five years old, I made up this game I used to play with our chickens…”
“Heidi!” my Mother called from the front porch, “Lunch will be ready in five minutes!”
“Okay!” I hastily called back, barely pausing from my game.
“Here, chicky, chicky, chicky,” I said softly, tiptoeing across the chicken coop with my eyes glued to the corner of the coop, “I’m not going to hurt you.”
When I got close enough, I shot out my little arm and grabbed the unsuspecting chicken. She immediately started flapping like crazy.
“Whoah! You’re okay, you’re okay!” I said, feathers and dirt flying into my face.
I quickly ran the flailing creature over to the three garbage cans on the other side of the coop.
I pulled the lid off the nearest can, stuffed the chicken inside and closed the lid before that chicken, or any of the others inside, could fly out.
“Ruff, ruff!” our cocker spaniel barked excitedly.
Tammy watched me from outside the coop and wagged her tail wildly.
I bent down and smiled at her through the chicken wire.
“Hey girl!” I said, putting out my hand for her to lick through the wire, “I’m doing good today, huh?”
More tail wagging.
“I only have two chickens left, can you believe that?!” I whispered confidentially, “I’ve never caught them all before, but today I’m going to!”
Then I turned back to the coop. I chased down the last remaining chickens and promptly stuffed them in the cans with the rest of their flock.
Dusting off my hands, I smiled down at Tammy.
“I did it!!” I exclaimed, “I caught every single chicken, plus all our pigeons!”
More tail wagging.
“See those two cans?” I pointed, “They’re both filled to the top with chickens. And that third one has the pidgeons.”
“Heidi!” my Mother called again from the porch, “Lunch is ready!”
“Coming, Mom!” I yelled as I turned and opened the door to the coop.
All thought of the captured chickens flew completely out of my head…
To be continued…